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Business? or Pleasure?

14 comments.

Oh my God, you guys.  I am SO~~ confused.

I have an account with a small bank that has only several branch locations.  They happened to have a branch close to my work, so I've been using that branch for 2 1/2 years.

Whenever I go there, I would see this teller lady, I will call her Ms. Moolah.  Ms Moolah is a classy older woman with glasses.  For two and a half years, I have never seen her wearing the same clothes twice. We exchange small talk whenever I see her.  I like her and I find her attractive.  She has to know that I like her.

One day, on my lunch time, I went to the bank for a routine deposit and saw Ms. Moolah standing out in the lobby area.  It was the first time seeing her not sitting behind the counter.  So, I gave her a hug.  She hugged me back.  Then she went back behind the counter to take care of me.  I told her how she was always looking good.  "Good for you" I said.  Then I went back to work.

Three days later, I received a card from the bank.  It was a hand-written card from Ms. Moolah herself.   She also included her business card with her email address.

I am SO~~~ confused.  What do you make out of this?  What should I do?

Comments

Comment: 

I only have $5K in the checking account.  This is my rainy-day fund. I am not a high roller.  I may look like a million bucks, hehe.. :)

Anyway, it is SO~~ confusing for a single man to receive that kind of note after a hug, after 2 1/2 years of using the bank.

:(

By john

Comment: 

John - This is a standard note that banks nowadays send as a way of keeping customers, and especially customers that have large accounts. I receive a note like this from my banker at Wells Fargo 2-3 times a year. I wouldn't really read too much into it.

Perhaps you're surprise/delight is not so much an indication of a potential "date," but speaks to something that is now so rare - excellent and dedicated customer service, where businesses go out of their way to thank you for patronizing them.

By Zafa (not verified)

Comment: 

Hi.  Thank you for reminding me.

Posted... :(

By john

Comment: 

John, Please give us an update. Its been more than a month now. Thanks!

By well-wisher (not verified)

Comment: 

If she were the bank manager and wrote the note I'd be more willing to think maybe it's just a business thing. It's much less likely that as a teller she wrote the letter to keep you from moving your moolah to Wells Fargo. Wasn't her bank email or personal email? If personal then it's clear. If business then it's still appropriate to ask her to coffee, save the dinner date question till after coffee.

By Mike jones (not verified)

Comment: 

It's just business, John. You interested in her?
I think, like the first answer (anonymous), that banking is a ridiculously competitive business (small banks are eaten up all the time, we all see that) she's trying to ensure you do any larger business at her desk. She's probably not interested beyond that.

By Emwill (not verified)

Comment: 

HAHAHAHA~!!  Oh boy..   Thank you for your input.

Update coming up soon..

It's not good.  :(

By john

Comment: 

Howdy..been out of town and just saw this post. Any update how did things turn out?

Possibly three explanations for her actions, two of them good.

First, you mentioned this is a small bank. Perhaps their customer service strategy is a bit more personal than the large money center banks and that explains her note, strictly platonic.

Second, perhaps your interaction meant a lot to her and she is trying to keep the dialogue moving forward. She is in a tough spot, she can't chase you, but it is appropriate that she wrote a thank you note...now the ball is back in your court.

Finally, quite possibly she is naive. She just thinks you are being friendly and doesn't perceive your interest. I can relate to this as my wife never realizes when we are in public and guys check her out and are overly friendly. She always think they are being nice to her. Other people have told her she is naive too. Your banker may be naive. 

If I had to guess I'd say it is likely one of my last two points.

Go John go...go John go!! 

 

By clemson90

Comment: 

Ho boy.. Understood.  Thank you for your note.

By john

Comment: 

I agree with Nicole. I wouldn't have taken the trouble to write that handwritten note unless I liked someone and wanted them to know. You could mention your surprise on receiving that note since its rare to receive a handwritten one these days. If she says its a norm to send these and tries to sell your something then anonymous who says is business is right but if she smiles sweetly and doesn't try to sell you anything then ask her out for coffee to thank her for her thoughfulness. :-) Good Luck!

By well-wisher (not verified)

Comment: 

Hm~   I see...  Thank you.
(thinking...)

By john

Comment: 

"She has to know that I like her."

NO, as a female, I can say with 100% certainty that not all of us are as observant when it comes to picking up signals. Especially when you've been out of the dating pool for quite some time, it's hard to gauge a man's level of interest.

Also, as a (relatively conservative and old-fashioned) female, I would not go out of my way and make a very personal statement by sending a handwritten note to a man- unless I wanted to let him know that I like him.

In short, I don't think you have anything to lose by asking her out for coffee. Good luck!

By Nicole (not verified)

Comment: 

HM~!!  I see.
Thank you  :)
 

By john

Comment: 

I say it's just a business thing, thank the customer and next time try to sell them a credit card or line of credit. When I was a teller, we were partly paid on commission and the pressure to sell was very high.

By Anonymous (not verified)

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